Fabulous and Fraught

Recommend listening: Shambolics "Universal Credit" (Spotify) (YouTube)

CURRENT CONFLICTS highlight the inherent difficulty of a unified approach to peace in a world divided by factors such as race, religion, prosperity and... spandex. For the war in Ukraine to the conflict in Israel, the sequinned and camp celebration of 'music' that is Eurovison has become as fraught as it is fabulous this year. Let's have an unreasonable debate...

Full confession - I love Eurovision. From early memories of my friends and I being a tad drunk in the back garden of my childhood home, wandering in out of the sun to see (I think) the Serbian (oe some other former Yogoslavian) entry performing with a person struggling in a bag behind them on stage, to the modern pyro-technic, power-station draining spectacular there is one consistent - it never takes itself too seriously. Acts flirt with new and interesting ways to bend the rules on nakedness.. or implying it. And the UK are normally, unashamedly, shit. With the exception of when they actually find someone with talent, like the lion-maned, space loving collection of teeth-playing-a-guitar that was Sam Ryder. (Warning: going to be a bit serious for a bit)

After the invasion of Ukraine by Russia in 2022, Eurovision barred Russia entries from taking part, a ban that is still in place as the conflict rages on. The European Broadcasting Union's chosen permanent slogan 'United By Music' didn't sit well with Putin's imperialistic actions. Fast-forward to 2024 and Israel are engaged in a war (armed struggle, conflict, genocide - depending on what sources you choose to read) with Hamas after the terrorist organisation breached the border fence and killed around 1,200 Israeli civilians and took 250 captive. Israel's response has been to root out and destroy Hamas wherever it can find it in the crowded Gaza strip using majority American supplied weaponry, so far killing a reported 34,000 or more Palestinians, with 70% of those estimated as being women and children. By comparison, the two-year-long war in Ukraine has resulted in around 30,000 civilian casualties on the Ukrainian side (I couldn't find any for Russia), with a staggering near 500,000 deaths and injuries to soldiers across both sides.

So what gives, Eurovision? Are Israel too fast and efficient to be banned? Have convential troop deaths not met a benchmark? Is Israel's speedier decimation of Palestinian infrastructure, homes and lives somehow admirable? Or is it because Ukraine didn't attack Russia first? Those are provocative questions and over-simplistic. While the invasion of Ukraine was, let's face it, based on the mad world-view of a despotic dictator enforcing their belief of what a great Russia should look like, the Israel-Palestine conflict is mired in a huge amount more complexity fuelled by race, religion and international meddling. Though the outcome is the same - a belief that one nation should not exist for the historic comfort of another - you cannot draw a direct comparison between the two when analysed. Everyone from the U.S to the UK and everyone in between has opined how a two-state solution should be reached between Israel and Palestine, while supplying weapons to Israel and ignoring the creeping expansion of illegal settlements. Similar contortions emerge regarding Ukraine and Russia as the conflict rumbles on, slapping Russia with sanctions while still finding ways to buy its gas and oil. Nobody can even enforce the legally acknowledged borders of Palestine, recognised in 1967 so imagine, if you will, Poland and Sweden being at ease with pandering to Russian aggression and recognising annexation of any Ukrainian territory after 2022.

"The absence of talent and the mediocrity of the songs were where annoyance set in. Eurovision is a monument to inanity."

Messy, isn't it? And perhaps understandable that Eurovision does not want to touch the 'Israel' topic with a rusty barge-pole after getting involved with Russia. However, being 'United By Music' should be more than a funky marketing catchphrase and, if you are going to ban one nation for sullying this ideal, you should be consistent. This inconsistency could be a poison that starts to eat away at the competitions foundations. In 1982, France famously declined to enter Eurovision because "The absence of talent and the mediocrity of the songs were where annoyance set in. Eurovision is a monument to inanity [sometimes translated as "drivel"]." - the Eurovision organisers must be concerned that their current inability to maintain a consistent approach to conflict could overwhelm the ludicrous festival of entertainment, or inanity, so many, including myself, look forward to. In a world powered by social media, it is a lot harder to stick your fingers in your ears and warble "la la la, I'm not listening!" when you have already flexed your political muscles.

This article was inspired by a late-night discussion with my youngest, who has to navigate 'news-by-tiktok', among others, more than I ever had. It can be increasingly hard to separate fact from opinion (they are doing a good job of it, by the way), especially with topics that are as complex as ones like this. Particularly when use that world as a promotion tool for your own content, like Eurovision does. Youtube, Instagram, TikTok - Eurovision is all over that shiz, but the kickback that is encountered cannot be ignored, or complained about. If you dance with the devil, expect to be get burned etc. etc. As the protests in Malmo during the semi-finals, and undoubtedly during the finals prove, those who see your double standards will quickly and noisily point them out.

It didn't take long for the situation to spillover into the competition itself either, with my favourite entry, Ireland, being told to change their face tattoo when it was discovered that the Ogham script translated to "ceasefire and freedom". It's an interesting dichotomy for Eurovison, trying to be non-political in an increasingly politicised world, standing for love and understanding while banning demonstrations of solidarity or a desire for peace. The Dutch entry, due to perform on the bill directly before Israel, mysteriously missing from two dress rehearsals after a press conference, has been as explicit as they can be about their feelings around the inclusion of Israel in the song contest - their irritation at not being able to talk openly about it has been palpable. It has since been announced (as I was writing this) that he was investigated for an allegation of intimidation towards a member of production crew and has since returned home. The Dutch broadcaster seem less than convinced - expect more to follow. Some speculated from watching clips on Youtube, that the Israel performer, herself the daughter of Jewish parents who left Russia in 2022, was possibly facing unwarranted behaviour from others. I know nothing of her thoughts, opinions and actions - but any competition promoting unification through music that requires security convoys for participants is missing the mark somehow.

Whilst I don't think boycotting watching Eurovision will have any measurable effect at this moment in time (I will be watching it on catch-up after going to see Frankie Boyle tonight... what a combo), much like Keir Starmer accepting dubious right-wing MP's into the Labour Party - if Eurovision's double-standards continue to undermine its permanent slogan, giving it any moral bandwidth will be increasingly difficult. There's a crap-tonne wrong with a world revolving around social-media, but the ability to expose hypocrisy and disrupt the carefully crafted, glittery self-image that brands generate whilst ignoring real-world responsibilities, shouldn't be under-estimated or under-used. No loved brand should be impervious to inconvenient truths. Just don't do it on Twatter. Get grumpy, ghosties. 👻

#Eurovison #Israel #Ukraine #Joost #Ireland